Team Building Tips

The shower went from volcanic to polar temperatures with no warning, room service took an average of 70 minutes, the housekeeper thought that the room was empty and stormed in during my post-jetlag early bedtime, the TV screen told me I would be charged for movies that I had not watched, one of the telephones in the room did not work, and next door neighbours had a 24-hour party which the thin walls broadcast to the world. And the price of the room was astronomical.

I looked in her eyes and described the litany of problems, frustrations and near-suicidal feelings. I was furious. I looked and sounded furious. She took some notes on a little yellow pad while nodding at my list of problems. She even looked sympathetic for a fraction of second. "Obviously, sir, I will let the manager know." OK, great! Then she hands me the bill.
"Did you have a good stay, sir?"

"No, I didn't have a good stay, as a matter of fact, I have just explained to you for the last ten minutes that I've been on the verge of a nervous breakdown and those sort of states usually are mutually exclusive with a good stay." "I am sorry to hear that, sir. Next time we will make sure that things are better." "There isn't a next time, my friend." "Excuse me?"
"Oh, forget it."

Then she looks puzzled. I have the bill in my hands and haven't put it away or gone yet. I am in the process of exhibiting the strangest of behaviours, apparently, that is, reading it.

"OK, all set," she sort of insists. "No, it's not all set," I pronounce with a heavy accent on the 'all'. "May I read it and see if I agree?" "Yes, sure, but it's all on your American Express already." "Tell me, is it common practice here to ignore the content of bills?" "No sir, of course sir, you are welcome to do it... but usually people here come on business."

I'll spare you my comments on the incredible inference that people in business are not expected to care about bills; they are all expenses after all and usually somebody else's money.

That lady at the front desk had a very precise mental (and physical) algorithm on what to do and what to say. It was all in the training manual, I suppose, and in some sort of Standard Operating Procedure where deviations are not allowed, judgement not needed. A robot from Silicon Valley could have done a similar or even better job.

Management can be very similar to front desks at 7am in exclusive business hotels. In some organisations things must happen in a standard way and deviations are a sin. Many managers are trapped in semi-religious attitudes towards 'the process'.